Annoying!

A few months ago we held a prayer meeting in the chapel. During the course of the evening words of prophesy started showing up. There were some real inspiring words given as well as some not so inspiring ones. Giving further validation to a silent theory I’ve had that on even the best of days prophesy can be hit or miss. So here’s where things begin to get annoying. One man gets up and points to my wife and I and asks us to stand so that he can give us a word. I begin to prepare myself to hear the usual “God wants to bless you and I’m hearing more of this and more of that, thus sayeth the Lord”. Oh, I wish it had been that generic. This man begins to prophesy that Tara and I are going to have twins (miniature humans that are born on the same date, from the same mother and sometimes even look the same). Ugh! Now before you start judging me for my reaction, hear me out and do so knowing that any comments left to this blog that are meant to “Change my mind” or “Enlighten” me will not only fail but fail miserably.

If you know anything about prophesy, then you know that it is mean to confirm a word that God has already given someone. A word of prophesy will, as they say, bear witness with something God has already warned or spoken to the heart of the person/s receiving the word. This separates it from being a word of knowledge or a word of wisdom. So, now that you and I have our theology straight I can continue. Tara and I have prayed, talked and prayed some more about the issue of us having children. especially since several of our married peers are interested in having kids (which by the way is no sin and I certainly pray that they are successful in that endeavor). But as for Tara and I, we don’t see the need for us to have children at this time. I for one am not too proud to admit that I am too selfish to be trusted with a child. We lead fast paced lives that don’t coincide well with the healthy upbringing of a child. I would imagine that a child would need proper nourishment, adequate sleep, positive reinforcement from a parent ( as opposed to sarcastic abuse). I am simply not prepared to go there. I stay up late, we hang out till all hours with friends, we eat garbage (not literally), and lets face it if the kid poops on the floor, I am more apt to smacking him on the nose with a newspaper.

The other day I led the Tuesday night prayer meeting and after we finished a lady came up to me and said ” I felt the need to pray for you and your wife, the Lord told me that you were going to have a baby before a year”. What year, I don’t know. I can only assume that she meant that before 365 were over Tara and I would have a child. I gave her the most Churchy-political response I could. Well needless to say, God must have changed his mind on the twins thing. Im afraid Im going to have to call this what it is, CRAP. Everyone loves a good romance especially when the story ends something like, and they all lived happily ever after. So you have a young married couple, they are in the ministry, whats next? Kids of course! Either people believe that were in a hurry to fulfill the american dream or they are trying to live vicariously through us. Either way they are wrong. So let it be known, Marc and Tara are NOT trying to get pregnant, they DO NOT want children at this time, Marc DOES pray over the birth control. If God wanted us to have kids, he himself would tell us, probably with a blue plus sign. Anyway, thats whats annoying me this week.

I’ll finally give my two cents.

Some of you might remember a post from a few months back titled ”I feel I should explain” (5,8,08). In light of last month’s revelation concerning the Lakeland revival and Todd Bentley, I present the following (Potentially offensive material ahead read at your own risk).

Love Garden

About a week ago I was doing some work in the yard and noticed that two of our plants were looking really bad. I’m talking about withered leaves and dried out stems. I was convinced that I was going to have to haul them to the dumpster and then go out and find plants to replace them. But instead I decided to water them, even though that made as much sense as serving prime rib to a stuffed animal. I made sure to give each plant plenty of water and place them under another tree so that they would get a specific amount of sunlight. I came back two hours later to what seemed like a miracle. Both plants looked nursery new with brilliant green leaves and hearty stems. I was quite amazed since like I said the only word to describe how they looked before was dead. Of course the story doesn’t end there, imediatley it became clear that love works much the same way. Sometimes we neglect our responsibilities to nurture a relationship, it doesnt matter what kind of relationship. So as a result the relationship takes on a dry, weathered, or dead appearance. But if you choose to pour a serious amount of love into that relationship, you’d be surprised at the revitalization that takes place. So think about it, Say your in a relationship that used to be better than it is, Pour love into it. Or say your in a relationship that you would like to see get stronger, Pour love into it. Parental, platonic, or romantic relationships are all based on love. So, it doesnt matter what kind of relationship it is, Pour love into it. What if we were as passionate about each other, as we are about that person in the mirror? Its easier to love someone that already means the world to you, but what splendid array would our garden of love produce if we were to enrich every relationship with love?

What Blog?

Yes I am aware that I have neglected my little corner of the internet for sometime now. but now that school has started again I find myself with some “blog ammo”. last week I was on my way east on expressway 83 to look for some brick for Team Impact! (Their name pretty much dictates an exclamation mark after it). just east of the interchange some guy in an Escalade swerves in front of me in order to pass a slower driver. as he passes he shoots him the bird. I shrugged it off since, according to Urban Dictionary this is par for the course in the RGV. Well, not long after that the Escalade and I end up side by side as we pass the San Juan Shrine, A.K.A. “God’s vacation home away from the Vatican”. Well the guy in the Caddy uses the same hand that flipped off the other driver to make that “Cross Sign” thingy on himself. I couldn’t help but snicker about it (yes i snickered). People are so strange, and Im sure some people would say the same thing about my irrationalities.

           This week I started school and I was for some reason shocked at all of the “fashion shows” going on. literaly every hallway was filled with five foot wannabe models. Don’t get me wrong, I dispise the fashion industry and not out of pretense, so don’t go pointing out scenes from The Devil Wears Prada. but these people didn’t seem aware that they were not within the arrogantly defined class known as fashonista. I saw more leg and cleavage than any man should in a five to ten minute span. I mentioned it to Isbel and she said something that I hadn’t thought about. she said that some of these girls spent the better part of the night before picking out what they woud wear to school the next day. I hadn’t considred that (of course), and upon further consideration I began to understand just how insecure and unsafe we feel, even in our own skin. So I began to take stock in the beauty of what it is to be human. Not, a five foot ten or six eleven, lean abercrombie machine, but a human as created by God. I cant describe what overwhelming emotion gripped me as I chose up to five things I found beautiful about every one of those closest to me. Im not talking about just the physical but the sum of who they are both male and female. And if within my small circle of fellow human beings, I can be overwhelmed with their beauty, then how much more is God enraptured by the beauty of all his beloved creation?

Vacation.

So, the time has come. From July 14th-18th the wife and I will be vacationing in a place whose name does NOT rhyme with Edinburg, Kansas City or Lakeland, and enjoying some much needed time away. Bayou Boogie will also be joining us, (was there ever any question). The thing I find strange is that I’m begining to plan (haha) how I can use this time away to organize some things with VSF and school. I know, Bad idea especially with Tara around, but the temptation to transpose some music and perhaps start an original, or write a couple sermons and make some calls to Burchfield as well as fill my class scheduel is pretty strong. For those that don’t know my achilles tendon is feeling much better after a short but painful bout with tendonitis, so i could always catch up on my running.  I’ll probably take my guitar or the mandolin Kowalski lent me and strum out a few chords before weeks end. I wish I was Jeremy Nava. I could take a book but thats useless, But thats because I rarely read for entertainment. (You have Kierkegaard and to Nietzsche blame for that, they are afterall the inspiration behind my now defunct existential persuit. or is it?) I could park my butt if front of a cable equiped television for hours on end and explore the term “veg out” or I could transport the playstation and really get into Sly Cooper. Ah, one things for sure, you shouldnt count on hearing from me.

Commitment <scary word

Well, I haven’t done one of these, “Start blogging without a topic and see what turns out blogs” yet, so lets see what turns out. Today I received yet another credit card application in the mail. So as usual I proceeded to tear it up. Once I had finished doing that, I saw on one of the thirds of paper left from my biased destruction, print that said 0% on one line followed by nsfers on the next line. I suddenly realized that I have a credit card that is about to end its introductory offer of 0% on balance transfers. And here I am staring at the shredded opportunity to yet again differ on paying that APR for a year (and possibly pay off the principle before they can even charge me an APR!) So I proceed to grab som scotch tape and tape the pieces together so that I can get the information I need to perhaps call and apply for the card. As it turns out, It is an internet offer and the only way to apply is to get on the issuing Bank’s website and do it there. So I proceed to the website and as I begin filling out the information page on the application document, That good-ole struggle with commitment begins to creep in. Now we all know  that I am notoriously opposed to many forms of commitment, and in stereotypical Marc fashion I quickly closed the page and said, “I can do this tomorrow, Ive got till mid June. Just another one of those situations where I need to be tossed into the lake before I enjoy a swim.

I feel I should explain.

I’m not usually one who feels like he has to explain himself to anyone. It’s not arrogance, It’s just that if you don’t get me, well, then you just don’t get me. But the question has come up more than once. “Marc, how come when the spirit of God moves, you don’t laugh or cry?” This isn’t a totaly easy question to answer but I will try. When the spirit of God begins to move on me, God tends to do alot of speaking and revealing. Therefore I tend to get a little quiet (rare) and usualy repeat what the Lord tells me. It’s important to remember that God is a Spirit and those that Worship him must worship him in spirit and in truth. When the Spirit of God begins to move on me he moves in my spirit first, not my body or my mind. So when I respond to the spirit of God it is usually going to be in the spirit, not through my body or emotions. I understand that there are many who, when they get touched by God, will usually go into some physical or emotional reaction and thats fine. I simply don’t do that. I find that my time with God is highly productive not just for myself but for those I lead and others around me. When God moves on me there is more at stake than just “a great time with the Lord” as a leader my time with God also affects those I lead so it has to be more than a cry-fest. I think of Lou Engle, Ive never seen him loose it under the power of the Holy Ghost. He may rock back and forth to varying degrees, but God is moving and he keeps speaking. Brother Tommy, Same thing, He doesn’t do the rocking thing but he makes sure that whatever God is doing benefits the entire congregation. I could keep it home and point to Pastor Jim, Who may get a bit misty eyed or do a quick jig at the pulpit but he remembers theres an entire world in need. Lets go to the day of Pentecost, Here’s Peter and some of the disciples and other Christ followers and as they are praying the spirit of God falls and some start speaking other languages and others just go nuts under the power. Some even thought they were drunk. But how do we know about this story? Because Peter, explained what was going on. If Peter could explain what was going on then he wasn’t on the ground in a pool of snot and tears. In other words, when it comes to corporate settings, being drunk in the spirit will for the most part be the luxury of those not in leadership or new to the power of the anointing.  That’s not to say I never get “drunk in the spirit” it simply means that you will probably never see it. I would encourage people to remember that my relationship with God is not limited to what you see on Wednesday nights. There is alot more personal and private things at work in my spirit that you may or may not ever know. This is the best I can do to explain this somewhat sensetive and sercret part of my life. I hope it answers any questions some may have and eases any concerns others may have had about my sincerity.

JANE! get me of this crazy thing!

So today the “powers that be” decided to give my wife more grief. Apparently they hauled her into a meeting with the superintendant’s secretary (Ooooh scary). Anyway more crud from the mouth of the lawless. They told her once again not to socialize outside of the classroom with her students. Apparently “some parents” have been calling the superintendant’s office and complaining about my wife and her Church relationship with some students. I should explain that several kids that happen to attend the noname highschool where my wife is employed have attended our youth services. not to mention that there are other teachers in our congregation with students from their districts attending our church. My wife does not preach in her classroom, she does not wear Christian T-shirts to work, she does not force or encourage her students to attend any church much less ours. As a matter of fact we have reason to believe that after all Tara has done and sacrificed for these little darlings some have chosen to make her life miserable because she held a standard of morality to them and they diddnt quite measure up. Tara now feels her only recourse is to quit where she is working less she be fired. Its strange that it should come after such a powerful service as we had last night. (read enemy at work) But alas I am not without guilt. In stereotypical Marc fashion I went into attack mode calling our pastor , a lawyer and sending an E-Mail to the American Center for Law and Justice (A christian based civil liberties law firm in Washington D.C. that specializes in matters of Church and State.) I got a return call literally minutes after I sent the E-Mail. And a zealous Christian lawyer by the name of Kris was ready to jump all over it. In all my going to war I forgot my poor wifes tender and broken heart ( it might surprise some of you that I do that often). And who can blame her, she has poured out so much for these girls and only to see that being attacked in this way can do no less than sweep the rug out from one’s feet. I’ll end up appologizing as usual, I should probably get used to it. But when I get set off I can’t explain what kind of focus comes over me. Its win or die, Black and white, who’s on the Lord’s side and who’s gonna get cut up by the wild sword yielding prophet! Ahhhh! We need your prayers. If its not an attack on my health (or mental stability) Its an attack on Tara’s emotions, family or something else. I can only look to the progress weve made at VSF and the numbers by which it has grown and say, God Keep shaking it, even if it hurts a little…..

Tired/uninspired

I’m in need of another break.. Tara looks like she could use one more than me. Oh well, we press on. So……. awkward silence of a guy with not much to say…… At least I’m still around.

I don’t even know what to say….

You can read Tara’s blog concerning some of our April Fools day, the other part includes us having to attend an all but mandated staff prayer meeting. I get the point of it I’m just a little skeptical. After talking to a fellow staffer (who did not attend said meeting) i found I agreed with some of what he had to say. ” Marc, what if revival did break out? I’ll bet you that even if we did have revival we would still take 45 minutes for announcements. And what if we were to have meetings every night of the week who would fulfill the duties of those meetings? we don’t have the infrastructure to support a revival and we dont have the desire to escape the mundane.” GOOD POINTS! I’m feeling a little numb. I think I’ll raise an Army and just have them ready… As for the prayer meetings, until I hear otherwise I’ll approach them with my usual “let’s see if anything happens” attitude. for the rest of todays frustration I refer you to Tara’s blog.